Today I was reminded of the heartache I experienced when losing Elliott a year and a half ago. A dear friend of mine was to become a mother today through adoption, but instead the birth mom chose to keep the baby. I can't fathom the roller coaster of emotions she felt finding out they would have a child and then realizing that they wouldn't. I cried for them today and wished that I could take their pain away. No one should be robbed of their chance to be a mother, whether it is through infertility, miscarriage, or a failed adoption.
I can't help but question why God didn't answer my friend's prayer to become a mom. Her and her husband have the sweetest, most gentle spirits I know and they deserve to be parents more than most of us. I know there were so many of us who prayed so earnestly to God for Him to grant the desire of their hearts, so why did this happen? Ashley reminded me that this is a fallen world and when we live in this fallen world there will always be heartache and pain. However, knowing this doesn't make it any easier. I want to take her hurt away. I want to carry the burden for her, or at least with her through the dark days ahead.
It was in the darkest of days after losing Elliott that it didn't seem that there would ever be light at the end of the tunnel, but eventually Ashley and I came through the many heartaches we experienced. And we realized that God was the same through both the painful and joyful times. My prayer is that I can be a small sliver of comfort for my friend who lost her chance to be a mother and hopefully share in times of joy very soon when the desire of her heart is given to her as a little blessing.
I know that many of you don't know my friend, but please pray for comfort for her and her husband right now. Though this child was never theirs, they loved the little baby like their own and so the loss is the same as if it was their own child.